It’s not you…it’s your nervous system

If you have ever noticed yourself becoming irritated or overwhelmed simply because you have been around people for too long, then that is not a personality flaw, it’s your nervous system asking for space 

All of us need a break from stimulation, from noise, from feeling we are constantly having to be there for others at the expense of our own wellbeing. 

Silent time, even short moments, can be when we reconnect to our body, sense where we felt tension - jaw, shoulders, pelvic floor, hands, toes - and begin to shift gently out of survival mode, back towards clarity 

People who appear calm , aren’t magically batter at coping, they have learned to protect their quiet

Without this kind of pause, even the most grounded person could struggle, but as you build your capacity to be with the negativity that the world just seems to throw at us on a daily basis

( doom scrolling anyone ?) we can feel steadier, less reactive, respond rather than rush in like a bull in a china shop as my nan used to say, but for me, more importantly, know when it’s time to take a break and rest

So, a rest can be anything from watching a funny movie to a piece of cake at the cafe, to reading a chapter of your book in the bath to going for a slow walk with the camera with no intention to even take a photo, just be open to what comes up

When our nervous system becomes overloaded, though doom scrolling or others demands of our time, a bossy boss at work, constant stimulation - and I am including the sound of the TV being on in the background all the time in that - we can feel restless , resentful, angry, scratchy, irritated, frustrated, detached, numbing habits like drinking, shopping, eating, scrolling and for some of us an unexplained pain in the body sometimes too, without realising what is going on

Learning to notice when we are becoming overloaded, takes time, awareness, slowing down and a daily practice, like brushing the teeth. 

It’s like training a muscle , but through safety, not force. 

And when the state started to shift, it’s noticeable, not just to yourself but others around you, because you feel more settled in yourself, your face will mirror that, your breath, your words, your choices. 

Boundaries matter, saying no matters, listening to your body matters

Not only can we be better versions of ourselves, but we can feel safer, calmer and more at home in ourselves 

Mel

Practice with your camera in a slow, intentional way here